Just listen: discover the secret to getting through to absolutely anyone

Foreword / Keith Ferrazzi

Sect. I. The Secret to Reaching Anyone

1. Who's Holding You Hostage?

2. A Little Science: How the Brain Goes from "No" to "Yes"

Sect. II. The Nine Core Rules for Getting Through to Anyone

3. Move Yourself from "Oh F♯@ & to OK"

4. Rewire Yourself to Listen

5. Make the Other Person Feel "Felt"

6. Be More Interested Than Interesting

7. Make People Feel Valuable

8. Help People to Exhale Emotionally and Mentally

9. Check Your Dissonance at the Door

10. When All Seems Lost

Bare Your Neck

11. Steer Clear of Toxic People

Sect. III. 12 Quick and Easy Ways to Achieve Buy-In and Get Through

12. The Impossibility Question

13. The Magic Paradox

14. The Empathy Jolt

15. The Reverse Play, Empathy Jolt #2

16. "Do You Really Believe That?"

17. The Power of "Hmmm ..."

18. The Stipulation Gambit

19. From Transaction to Transformation

20. Side by Side

21. Fill in the Blanks

22. Take It All the Way to "No"

23. The Power Thank You and Power Apology

Sect. IV. Putting It All Together: Fast Fixes for Seven Challenging Situations

24. The Team from Hell

25. Climbing the Ladder

26. The Narcissist at the Table

27. Stranger in Town

28. The Human Explosion

29. Getting Through to Yourself

30. Six Degrees of Separation.

Foreword / Keith Ferrazzi

Acknowledgments

section I. The secret to reaching anyone

1. Who's holding YOU hostage?

The persuasion cycle

The secret : getting through is simple

2. A little science : how the brain goes from "NO" to "YES"

The three-part brain

Amygdala hijack and the death of rational thought

Mirror neurons

From theory to action

section II. The nine core rules for getting through to anyone

3. Move yourself from "OH F♯@ & to OK"

Get through to yourself first

Speed is everything

The "Oh F♯@ & to OK" process

The power of "Oh F♯@ & "

The "Oh F♯@ & to OK" speed drill

4. Rewire yourself to listen

"But I do listen ... don't I?"

How well do you know the people you know?

5. Make the other person feel "felt"

Why does "feeling felt" change people?

The steps to making another person feel "felt"

6. Be more interested than interesting

The "interesting" Jackass

Don't just act interested

be interested

7. Make people feel valuable

8. Help people to exhale emotionally and mentally

Moving a person away from distress

Guiding a person to exhale

9. Check your dissonance at the door

The perils of corporate dissonance

When you can't avoid dissonance, anticipate it

10. When all seems lost

bare your neck

Show them your neck, and they'll want to show you theirs

11. Steer clear of toxic people

Needy people

Bullies

Takers

Narcissists

Psychopaths

Mirror check : who's the problem?

section III. 12 quick and easy ways to achieve buy-in and get through

12. The impossibility question

13. The magic paradox

The cascade of "yes"

A trust-gaining move

14. The empathy jolt

How it works

When to employ the empathy jolt

The power of analogy

15. The reverse play, empathy jolt #2

16. Do you really believe that?

17. The power of "Hmmm ..."

18. The stipulation gambit

19. From transaction to transformation

Negotiating versus relating

What question would make you look up?

20. Side by side

21. Fill in the blanks

22. Take it all the way to "no"

23. The power thank you and power apology

"Thank you" versus the power thank you

The power apology

section IV. Putting it all together : fast fixes for seven challenging situations

24. The team from hell

25. Climbing the ladder

26. The narcissist at the table

27. Stranger in town

The visibility stage

The credibility stage

The profitability stage

28. The human explosion

29. Getting through to yourself

30. Six degrees of separation

Create one-on-one situations

Make virtual allies

Reach the gatekeepers

Afterword

Index

About the author

Keynotes/Workshops.